Newsletter #9
/Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit
The first day of every month my kids and I say to each other rabbit, rabbit, rabbit, to wish each other good luck for the month ahead. It is a funny little tradition that we have and I had to share with you.
Do you have any silly traditions you do with your family? Please let me know. I would love to hear them…
Today I have been thinking about our inner voice, I would call it our inner critic but I decided not to. Criticism is a negative way of looking at our thoughts. I want us to look at our thoughts and relate them to how we are feeling in the moment, and feelings are ever changing. They are like liquid… and can’t really fit into a good or bad category. Because in one moment it may be good and the next bad.
I have really been trying to stop and pay attention to my thoughts and recognize them as productive and non-productive. The negative thoughts are mostly in the “need to change that” file. For example, I just texted a friend and they haven’t gotten back to me in seconds or minutes and a negative thought maybe, “that person hasn’t texted me back, oh they must not like me”. How many people feel like that all of the time? I would bet a lot.
It is my job to look at that irrational thought and change it. Instead of “they don’t like me” doesn’t it feel better if you instead think, “oh they must be really busy today’” and, “they will get back to me later ... .All's good.” That is how we change what is happening between our ears.
One of the hardest thoughts that I had in the past was the thought, “am I an alcoholic”? That was one that lingered for years. I knew I had a problem but I didn't want to deal with it until I was really ready.
That thought bounced in my head the most after I had decided to go out. See I was a black out drinker so if I went out I had probably had 47 cocktails, did and said things that I wasn’t proud of or worse yet, I had said and done things that I couldn’t remember. That was the absolute worst, I hated myself.
I didn’t want to be an alcoholic but I knew that I was! Read that again, I knew I was an alcoholic! It didn’t matter what my friends or family for that matter thought about me and my relationship with alcohol. It was how I felt.
Everytime I drank I felt bad.
When I had trouble in my life, alcohol was involved.
So, when I was finally ready to say out loud that I had an issue with alcohol was the moment my relationship with alcohol changed. I knew I couldn’t go on anymore with the insanity of my thoughts going back and forth, “Am I an alcoholic”.
When I made the decision to break up with booze, it was over.
Alcohol and I don’t mix well. Not to mention I can’t go back to the insanity.
That was when everything changed.
So if you are out there with an inner voice that is questioning your relationship with alcohol it is up to you to take the time to examine your thoughts. Is it true? Do you have an unhealthy relationship with alcohol? It is then and only then that you can take charge and change.
I pray that when you come to whatever conclusion that you come to is at a time when it isn't too late.
In closing I will tell you I have never regretted giving up alcohol, my only regret is that I wish I had done it sooner.
Have a happy happy and until next time keep getting busy living sober.
XO
Elizabeth aka Bizzy