A Winter Storm is Looming….

Years ago I remember a snowstorm being the perfect time to get rip roaring drunk! You couldn’t drive or go anywhere so why not get drunk? Today, that has all changed. I have no interest in missing any of this storm. I want to be present with my children! Yes, they are teenagers but that means we can watch movies together, play games, watch the snowfall and relax!

How often in our busy lives do we really take time to just slow down and do nothing? Never! At least at my house, it seems like everyone has an agenda and wants to constantly move and go, go, go! It will be really nice to play a game of Monopoly or that new one, Apples to Apples – which I have to admit I have never played and am looking forward to it.

I won’t be bored. I have a book that I’ve been wanting to read. Today, if you have an iPad, Kindle or a computer it doesn’t matter if you have a book. You can go online and purchase one! If you aren’t a reader, check out Netflix or HBO. You can binge on “Game of Thrones!” Then you will be ready for the new season! If you haven’t had enough of the current presidential campaign, another option is the Netflix series “House of Cards” with Kevin Spacey and Robin Wright.

The crazy thing about drinking away these times is that you can never get that time back! It is gone forever, so why not relax, try one of the many activities I mentioned above, and just enjoy storm? It is supposed to be big enough for the record books!

The last thing you want is to glimpse back and consider the snowstorm of 2016 with complete disregard. Rather, you should have fond memories of it. Maybe you’ll say, “That snowstorm of 2016 was awesome! I beat my kids at gin rummy and we watched the entire “Star Wars” trilogy!”

Get busy living!

#sobernotashamed

Friends

What is a true friend? Do you ever worry if you have enough friends, or if your child has enough? I hear these questions frequently and it always brings me back to my childhood. I can remember conversations with my Mother when I was a child and her advice: if you have 5 real friends in your lifetime, and she would hold out her hand and reiterate 5! 5 fingers! 5 true friends, you are lucky! She would look me in the eye and say, “Elizabeth a true friend is hard to come by!” Sitting here 30 plus years later I can say my Mom was right.

My definition of a friend:

-Loyal

-Honest

-Caring

-Not scared of being themselves

-Loving

-Non-judgmental

I have been graced with friends with the characteristics that I described above. One in particular had the strength and courage to tell me when I was drinking that she  “was scared of me when I drank. [She] was really worried about me!”. This friend is still a dear friend and I think about her all of the time! I feel so blessed that she said that to me over 10 years ago now. She planted a seed! And forever I will be grateful to my friend.

In closing, a true friend wants the best for you! It is hard not to fall for the people that want you to feel like they do! The old saying, misery loves company, is true! Stick with the friends that can be honest even in hard times. When you going through something and you come to the conclusion that you need to change something! For me the changes were associated with my drinking and divorce. My true friends are still by my side today and the ones that really didn’t care for my well-being and judged me are no longer contacts. Bottom line: choose wisely!

Busy Living Sober

#sobernotashamed

Being aware!

When I picked up my first beer at the age of 13, I thought I was cool. Little did I know that drinking beer/alcohol was going to be my number one coping skill for the next 24 years!

Drinking was the answer to all of my problems, it gave me the release from reality that I needed. I didn’t have to feel anything when I was partying; it was euphoric! I loved drinking! The blacking out not so much! My idea of an alcoholic was a homeless person. Family members had problems with alcohol and getting drunk but no one said that person was an alcoholic!

Today we know that alcoholism is genetic condition.

Do you have a problem with alcohol?

1.     Ask a trusted family member if they know of anyone that could have had a problem with alcohol or drugs. And, sometimes it could be a long lost uncle or aunt; it probably won’t take too long or too much digging.

2.     Honesty is the best policy and it is key to be honest with yourself. Who cares what others think it is about you?

3.     Realize that if you get into trouble, you can’t stop and alcohol takes precedence over more pressing issues in your life such as relationships, your job or financial obligations you may want to take a step back and look at your family history.

4.     Lastly, just because you drink too much every once in a while or you occasionally push the envelope does not mean you have a problem. If you are in tune to yourself, you know better than anyone if you need help. Just don’t let shame or self-judgment stand in the way of your health and your life!

Busy Living Sober

#sobernotashamed 

The Last Installment of the Bermuda Triangle

New Years Eve, or I like to call it amateur night! . The end of the holiday season, time to party big time! Everyone feels like they need to go out and whoop it up! Why? In Europe it is a time to reflect on what happened that year and what to look forward to in the coming year. 

New Years Eve when I was drinking was based on “the party”. Who was hosting? Would there be enough alcohol? How much was I going drink? I promised myself that, no matter what, I would only have one hard alcoholic drink; and every time I broke that promise, resulting in a blackout, meaning I woke up with no recollection of the prior night.

That hasn’t happened since I quit drinking many years ago, thank you GOD!  I hope that anyone out there who is reading this and thinks that they have a problem will have the courage to ask for help! I am not ashamed of being an alcoholic! I am proud of it! I don’t regret my past.  It is what made me who I am today: a strong woman with a vision of ridding society of shame surrounding addiction and alcoholism.

With that I wish you all a very Happy New Year! Take some time to reflect on 2015 and write down a couple of things that you want to accomplish in 2016. Life is an adventure! Enjoy your life and please don’t waste it. If you have a problem with alcohol, let it go and be FREE! Reach out!

#sobernotashamed