What is a true friend? Do you ever worry if you have enough friends, or if your child has enough? I hear these questions frequently and it always brings me back to my childhood. I can remember conversations with my Mother when I was a child and her advice: if you have 5 real friends in your lifetime, and she would hold out her hand and reiterate 5! 5 fingers! 5 true friends, you are lucky! She would look me in the eye and say, “Elizabeth a true friend is hard to come by!” Sitting here 30 plus years later I can say my Mom was right.

My definition of a friend:




-Not scared of being themselves



I have been graced with friends with the characteristics that I described above. One in particular had the strength and courage to tell me when I was drinking that she  “was scared of me when I drank. [She] was really worried about me!”. This friend is still a dear friend and I think about her all of the time! I feel so blessed that she said that to me over 10 years ago now. She planted a seed! And forever I will be grateful to my friend.

In closing, a true friend wants the best for you! It is hard not to fall for the people that want you to feel like they do! The old saying, misery loves company, is true! Stick with the friends that can be honest even in hard times. When you going through something and you come to the conclusion that you need to change something! For me the changes were associated with my drinking and divorce. My true friends are still by my side today and the ones that really didn’t care for my well-being and judged me are no longer contacts. Bottom line: choose wisely!

Busy Living Sober